You might be doing it wrong! How to masturbate (for men)

Who would’ve thought that you could be doing this wrong? That’s okay because you’re not alone. Many men struggle with masturbation. They just can’t seem to get it right. Luckily, we have just the right guide for you. We’ll give you some suggestions, nudge you in the right direction, and you’ll figure out what works best for you in no time. Let’s go!

Create the mood

We have a secret to share with you. Masturbation is actually a form of self-care! Yup, but don’t let other men hear this because they will probably stop doing it altogether. Sadly, men often grow up thinking that self-care is not manly and is actually for women only. That couldn’t be more wrong.

If masturbation doesn’t seem to work well for you, maybe it’s time to switch things up. You could try setting the mood. That doesn’t mean you’ll need a bed of roses. However, isn’t sex the best way to relax and give in to all the feelings? Let’s try that.

In case you don’t know where to start, we suggest playing some music that makes you feel good. See where that will take you.

Change up your positions

Masturbation shouldn’t look the same every time. That guarantees it will feel dull, and soon, you’ll find yourself desensitized to all the sensations you used to enjoy. It’s time to switch positions. Sitting down may be the most comfortable, but we’re trying to experiment here.

This idea may not make every man feel up for the task, so start simple. If you often sit during solo sessions, try laying down instead. If you’re feeling adventurous, try leaning against the wall or standing up in the shower. Exploring different positions will help you a lot.

Don’t rush

What’s the rush? We’re sure you don’t have anywhere to be because who starts a masturbation session when they have somewhere to be? Not you, we’ll assume. So it’s time you learn to take things slow. Quick strokes can be a fun way to finish, but you can do so much better.

Instead of finishing in a minute, try to build things up slowly. You can try playing with delaying orgasms. The slow buildup will result in stronger orgasms that you won’t forget so easily. Additionally, you’ll pick up on different methods to play with yourself.

Use a lubricant

Another reason why masturbation may not “work” for you is that you’re doing it dry. We know that isn’t a good feeling at all. So let’s change that a bit. Sure, you can lubricate with spit, but you don’t have to do that. Lubricant is readily available, and you can find it in just about any store.

Lubricant will allow you to make smoother strokes. In turn, you won’t have to deal with “rug burn” or desensitization that can come over time. No matter what kind of sex or masturbation we’re talking about, a lubricant is a must.

Tune into your body

Masturbation doesn’t only exist to get you off. You might see it only as a tool to achieve mind-blowing orgasms, but it can be so much more than that. Masturbation sessions allow you to explore different parts of your body and figure out the things you like or dislike.

How does this benefit you though? It will make you more confident. In turn, you’ll be able to perform better when you get into bed with your partner. That’s something everyone wants to achieve, so try treating masturbation like a meditation session. Your penis isn’t the only thing you could be stroking.

Different strokes for the same folks

Be honest — do you have a specific stroke technique or rhythm you go for every single time? It’s okay because this is common among men. There’s no reason to fix what isn’t broken, right? This logic isn’t something you should apply to everything. Here’s why.

Using the same technique makes you get used to that one technique. Now, imagine getting into bed with your partner, and they start doing something you’re not used to. That can result in unexpected orgasms, and you want to last as long as you can. Experimenting with different strokes will help you prepare for anything coming your way.

Play with toys

One of the best masturbation tips we can give you is to find a toy to help you. This only means you’re switching things up and trying to experience different sensations. Yes, we’re talking about realistic pocket pussies, butt plugs, and especially these tenga eggs from

You’ll be surprised by how helpful and exciting they can be. Pocket pussies can provide you with similar sensations as a real vagina. So who wouldn’t want to have one on hand to use whenever they like? Trust us when we say that you need to try one of these realistic vaginas.

Another thing you should get your hands on are Tenga eggs. These are small silicone egg-shaped toys that stretch over your penis for better masturbation. That’s not all though. Tenga products can have different pattern ridges on the inside, which means they’ll provide different sensations every time.

Vary Your Porn

Watching porn until your eyes pop has worked just fine so far, right? It’s time to switch things up again. Men are visual creatures but let’s try something else instead. Try reading erotica for once. Listening to audio erotica can be helpful as well.

The point is in closing your eyes and giving in to the feelings that erotica awakes inside of you. This will also help you be more in tune with your body. We know that closing your eyes can sometimes feel too intimate, but that’s exactly the point. You should be the most intimate with yourself.


While your eyes are closed, it’s time to employ yet another old but gold technique. This process will have you doing mental exercises, which means it’s quite active (unlike staring at porn stars). Fantasizing is simple since it’s just you and your thoughts.

You can fantasize about whatever turns you on. If you don’t have an ideal partner, you can make them up. The next thing is thinking about scenarios in which you two would be having fun. The more details you can think about, the better. Guess what this does? It helps you get in touch with your body, allows you to be more intimate with yourself, and gives you stronger orgasms.


Masturbation isn’t rocket science, but you should still have a few of these things in mind. It’s okay to switch things up and try something new, even if the old techniques work perfectly. Once you get better at masturbating, you’ll get better at performing in bed with a partner too.